Didn't I Just Do That? Argh! Part 1 of 3...
Hammer strikes lightbulb over head. I'm not sure that I should do this, since it's putting work out for everyone, but here goes.
When I first started the book, Cursebreaker in 2008, it wasn't necessarily a Luna. So it began this way:
************************************************
His wife was dying. Jordan sat in the molded plastic of the hospital chair, propped his arms on his knees, put his head in his hands. But nothing could block out the smell of the waiting room outside the surgical unit. Tinny sounds slid into his ears to rattle his brain, his nerve, his hope.
"It's the curse," his best friend, Ben, said. "Yours caught up with you first." Ben sucked in a breath as if he was still smoking, coughed it out. "Sorry, bro."
Jordan didn't lift his head, didn't want to think that what Ben said had even an iota of truth.
The opening of a door. Squeech, squeech, squeech. Rubber on linoleum footsteps. A quiet voice. "Mr. Wells."
He didn't look up, didn't want to see any emotions in others' eyes, was having enough trouble keeping himself together.
"I'm sorry," the doctor said.
His heart clenched, fell away into nothingness. He thought he'd follow. Not out of love, but out of guilt.
"Crap." Ben sat next to him. "I'm sorry, man."
More sucking of air, was that him wheezing or Ben?
"Could have been worse," Ben said. Or did he? Was that strained voice really Ben's? The words struck him. He lifted his head, stared at Ben, pale and glassy eyed. "Guess it's true. Curses work."
It had been so laughable back in their college days. Two students with such a weirdness in common, family curses.
Ben's words zinged around in Jordan's mind. "What. Did. You. Say? Could have been worse?"
A smile twitched Ben's lips. "Could have been worse. You could have loved her."
Jordan rocketed out of his chair, yanked Ben from his own, ploughed his fist into Ben's face.
**************************************************
But I can't do that in a Luna, which is a woman's story, so it needs to start with the heroine. And this story is now the SECOND of the Mystic Circle series.
AND, when I looked at this a sinking feeling occurred. Wasn't one of Jenni's big problems in Enchanted No More the fact that she lost her family? They DIED? Just like Jordan's wife.
Do I want to do that two books in a row?
No.
So I came up with the next opening (coming tomorrow).
Robin the tease
May stories please you today.
When I first started the book, Cursebreaker in 2008, it wasn't necessarily a Luna. So it began this way:
************************************************
His wife was dying. Jordan sat in the molded plastic of the hospital chair, propped his arms on his knees, put his head in his hands. But nothing could block out the smell of the waiting room outside the surgical unit. Tinny sounds slid into his ears to rattle his brain, his nerve, his hope.
"It's the curse," his best friend, Ben, said. "Yours caught up with you first." Ben sucked in a breath as if he was still smoking, coughed it out. "Sorry, bro."
Jordan didn't lift his head, didn't want to think that what Ben said had even an iota of truth.
The opening of a door. Squeech, squeech, squeech. Rubber on linoleum footsteps. A quiet voice. "Mr. Wells."
He didn't look up, didn't want to see any emotions in others' eyes, was having enough trouble keeping himself together.
"I'm sorry," the doctor said.
His heart clenched, fell away into nothingness. He thought he'd follow. Not out of love, but out of guilt.
"Crap." Ben sat next to him. "I'm sorry, man."
More sucking of air, was that him wheezing or Ben?
"Could have been worse," Ben said. Or did he? Was that strained voice really Ben's? The words struck him. He lifted his head, stared at Ben, pale and glassy eyed. "Guess it's true. Curses work."
It had been so laughable back in their college days. Two students with such a weirdness in common, family curses.
Ben's words zinged around in Jordan's mind. "What. Did. You. Say? Could have been worse?"
A smile twitched Ben's lips. "Could have been worse. You could have loved her."
Jordan rocketed out of his chair, yanked Ben from his own, ploughed his fist into Ben's face.
**************************************************
But I can't do that in a Luna, which is a woman's story, so it needs to start with the heroine. And this story is now the SECOND of the Mystic Circle series.
AND, when I looked at this a sinking feeling occurred. Wasn't one of Jenni's big problems in Enchanted No More the fact that she lost her family? They DIED? Just like Jordan's wife.
Do I want to do that two books in a row?
No.
So I came up with the next opening (coming tomorrow).
Robin the tease
May stories please you today.
posted by FantasyAuthor RobinDOwens | 1:43 AM
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