First Lines
Yes, First Lines are the ulitmate hook, important for everyone and most particularly for those who have not yet sold yet (see quote below). I'm thinking on this topic as I continue to craft a teaser chapter for Knight Protector. For the Teaser, which will probably be read by those finishing Sorceress of Faith, I can get away with less "set-up" of the worldbuilding -- explaining my alternate dimension/world Lladrana. So I thought I might actually START on Lladrana instead of on Earth -- and with previous characters. The first line will probably be "One night all the volarans disappeared." (Volarans are my flying horses).
I've tried to have "good" opening lines, but some are not as punchy as I would like. On the other hand, they gave me a good place to start.
Today you will meet your HeartMate. HeartMate, Jove Books, December, 2001
Ruis Elder stared out windows that faced the street, checking as he did several times a day that no strangers loitered nearby. No assassins or guardsmen hired by his uncle Bucus. Heart Thief, Berkley Sensation, April 2003
The audio page screamed at Lark, wrenching her awake. "Lark, NOW!" Primary HealingHall demanded. Heart Duel, Berkley Sensation, July 2004
Get me down. GET ME DOWN! The telepathic demand was imperious. Heart Choice, Berkley Sensation, July 2005
When the Star Etalla glows bright and moves through the constellation Caen; When mists envelope the stone circle high atop Archer's Mound; When the face of the Moon is hidden -- then the walls between worlds are thin, and you may Summon saviurs -- or demons -- from the Exotique Land. Send the Call. Choose well. Guardian of Honor, Luna Books, February 2005 BTW, the "Exotique Land" is Earth.
That's all for me today. Now I must write. A scene for Heart Quest is tugging at me...
Robin
I've tried to have "good" opening lines, but some are not as punchy as I would like. On the other hand, they gave me a good place to start.
Today you will meet your HeartMate. HeartMate, Jove Books, December, 2001
Ruis Elder stared out windows that faced the street, checking as he did several times a day that no strangers loitered nearby. No assassins or guardsmen hired by his uncle Bucus. Heart Thief, Berkley Sensation, April 2003
The audio page screamed at Lark, wrenching her awake. "Lark, NOW!" Primary HealingHall demanded. Heart Duel, Berkley Sensation, July 2004
Get me down. GET ME DOWN! The telepathic demand was imperious. Heart Choice, Berkley Sensation, July 2005
When the Star Etalla glows bright and moves through the constellation Caen; When mists envelope the stone circle high atop Archer's Mound; When the face of the Moon is hidden -- then the walls between worlds are thin, and you may Summon saviurs -- or demons -- from the Exotique Land. Send the Call. Choose well. Guardian of Honor, Luna Books, February 2005 BTW, the "Exotique Land" is Earth.
That's all for me today. Now I must write. A scene for Heart Quest is tugging at me...
Robin
posted by FantasyAuthor RobinDOwens | 5:04 PM
2 Comments:
I just started Heart Mate last night and you're right about the first line. Would it be acceptable to add something like that to a query letter as a hook?
I LOVE your website!
MerrisHawk
It would depend on the line. If you could work it into the summary of your story.
"Today you will meet your HeartMate." On the planet Celta, divination is done daily and believed...etc.
For fantasy, in my synopsis, I also include a paragraph on the culture, etc.
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