Changing Settings, before and after
Changing Settings -- I began writing a new scene today in Heart Secret and set it in a noble lord social club...and realized that during an awful lot of this book, people are having conversations over drinks...caff or cocoa or liquor. In any event, I knew I had to change the setting. So here's the before and after:
Garrett stared into the snifter that held his brandy. He slumped in the richly upholstered chair, legs stuck out. He'd barely noticed the interior of the exclusive FirstFamilies club – for men only. It was his understanding that the women had their own, more suited to their tastes. And as for tastes, the brandy wasn't much good.
But that could be because of the sourness in his mouth. Laev T'Hawthorn, who was the actual member of this club, sat at ease across from Garrett.
Sour mouth from the bitter ashes of regret and stinging pride or not, Garrett had to admit it. So he did, grunting the words. "I made a bad mistake."
Laev raised his brows. "What, another?" he asked in that dangerously smooth tone that a powerful man developed.
"Yeah, yeah," Garrett waved his snifter, nearly slopping the liquid from his glass.
"Shall I tell you the consequences of your last bad mistake?" Laev asked with obvious false sympathy. The guy was sure enjoying payback for earlier in the year.
"I suppose you looked it up," Garrett grumbled.
"Oh, yes. Though I didn't have to look far."
*********************************************
Garrett stared broodingly down the cliff at the bright blue waves topped with white spume, shifting restlessly from foot to foot, something he could only allow himself in the presence of a good friend. GreatLord Laev T'Hawthorn stood beside him, relaxed and easy. This was his land. Hell, the kilometers of the ocean that Garrett could see might be his water, too.
Taking in a deep breath, Garrett tasted salty air. Not especially good. But that could be because the sourness in his mouth. And sour mouth from the bitter ashes of regret and stinging pride or not, Garrett had to admit it. So he did, grunting the words. "I made a bad mistake."
Laev grinned, white teeth gleaming. "What, another?" he asked in that dangerously smooth tone that a powerful man developed.
"Yeah, yeah," Garrett said. He rolled a silver coin over his knuckles, good practice in the wind, demanding concentration and manual dexterity.
"Shall I tell you the consequences of your last bad mistake?" Laev asked with obvious false sympathy. The guy was sure enjoying payback for earlier in the year.
"I suppose you looked it up," Garrett grumbled.
"Oh, yes. Though I didn't have to look far."
As always, may you enjoy all the worlds you visit today.
Robin
Garrett stared into the snifter that held his brandy. He slumped in the richly upholstered chair, legs stuck out. He'd barely noticed the interior of the exclusive FirstFamilies club – for men only. It was his understanding that the women had their own, more suited to their tastes. And as for tastes, the brandy wasn't much good.
But that could be because of the sourness in his mouth. Laev T'Hawthorn, who was the actual member of this club, sat at ease across from Garrett.
Sour mouth from the bitter ashes of regret and stinging pride or not, Garrett had to admit it. So he did, grunting the words. "I made a bad mistake."
Laev raised his brows. "What, another?" he asked in that dangerously smooth tone that a powerful man developed.
"Yeah, yeah," Garrett waved his snifter, nearly slopping the liquid from his glass.
"Shall I tell you the consequences of your last bad mistake?" Laev asked with obvious false sympathy. The guy was sure enjoying payback for earlier in the year.
"I suppose you looked it up," Garrett grumbled.
"Oh, yes. Though I didn't have to look far."
*********************************************
Garrett stared broodingly down the cliff at the bright blue waves topped with white spume, shifting restlessly from foot to foot, something he could only allow himself in the presence of a good friend. GreatLord Laev T'Hawthorn stood beside him, relaxed and easy. This was his land. Hell, the kilometers of the ocean that Garrett could see might be his water, too.
Taking in a deep breath, Garrett tasted salty air. Not especially good. But that could be because the sourness in his mouth. And sour mouth from the bitter ashes of regret and stinging pride or not, Garrett had to admit it. So he did, grunting the words. "I made a bad mistake."
Laev grinned, white teeth gleaming. "What, another?" he asked in that dangerously smooth tone that a powerful man developed.
"Yeah, yeah," Garrett said. He rolled a silver coin over his knuckles, good practice in the wind, demanding concentration and manual dexterity.
"Shall I tell you the consequences of your last bad mistake?" Laev asked with obvious false sympathy. The guy was sure enjoying payback for earlier in the year.
"I suppose you looked it up," Garrett grumbled.
"Oh, yes. Though I didn't have to look far."
As always, may you enjoy all the worlds you visit today.
Robin
4 Comments:
you definitely like to tease us, your loyal readers! I really liked both the before and after, but the after gives a little bit more insight to Garrett in my opinion. When is this book coming out? (insert whine here)
August, if I can finish it by the end of the year...and the characters stop talking my ears off about the relationship and work the mystery... I see some cutting going on.
Ooh, a tasty teaser! I don't drink but if I did I'd avoid snifters as they always seem to involve people staring into them broodingly! Cliffs are much better (unless you're falling!).
Donna, you have a definite point there.
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